Monday, June 29, 2009

The post where I tell y'all how blessed I am.

Thanks for your words of encouragement after my last post about being down in the dumps. I have had several bad weeks that seemed to be a culmination of things.

But.........things are looking up!! My mind seems to be getting back to a more level place. I feel more in control of what is going on inside that scary brain of mine!

Thanks again-this is what blogging buddies are for....you make me realize it is ok to be me! Love You Guys.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

...It'll be alright, come Monday I'll be.......

In the gym by daylight??
Probably not but it sounds good with the song.
One of my very good high school buddies has decided to join us for EMME. Please take a minute today to stop over, read her story and welcome her into our group. Click on link to go Tricia's blog.
Thanks my blogger peeps!!! You are the best!

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Down in the Dumps

My story is very involved. I will just keep it brief and tell you my older sister died in a motorcycle crash 2 months after her high school graduation. This day was also my 11th birthday. The world as I knew it changed drastically. My mother went C-R-A-Z-Y! Now that I have children I get it. My 11 year old self didn't get it.
Everyday I get up and struggle with depression. Some of it is genetic, I really try not to play that card-it is too easy to slip into my life sucks and nothing is going to make it better mentality.
This week my days have been better. I really wish I were not so emotional. However, this is the life I have....
I want to enjoy it. But I don't.
There is really no good reason.
Except my mind is not right.
Just wanted to put this out there so I can look back and see where I am.

Extreme Makeover Me Edition

Here we are it has been another week. Be sure to visit Mr. Linky at Amber's website to learn more about her EMME!

{ae filkins}


Yesterday morning I was feeling thinner, I weighed and was down 2 pounds. In my effort to actually keep things real I went ahead and weighed this morning and found yesterdays 2 pounds....yep! I am right back where I was last week. I really am feeling better. Everyday I am trying harder to drink more water. (with the help of my Sonic cup)
My arms are feeling smaller, my face looks smaller. This week I am going to embrace that small victory and let myself enjoy the progress hopefully it will emerge in the form of motivation! (let me just get out my ring for the wonder twin activate in the form of positive self talk) If you didn't get that....sorry! If you did-well you know what that means!
This weeks question posed to all of us is.......

"Who is your biggest supporter/motivator in your weight loss? Do you have anyone around you that tries to sabotage you by "talking" you in to eating the not so good stuff?"

My husband is supportive, would do anything I asked him to help me out. (I just never ask) He would never make a comment about what I am eating or not eating. Exercising or not. Unless I specifically ask him to. And I don't. I don't like that kind of accountability. It makes me so much more likely to "cheat" when he is not around!

I did say in my last post that my daughter has been all about the exercise! She is very active and really happy to push me into working out...and if I slip into calling myself fat, she is quick to say "your not fat" its nice to hear, even if I know better. (I am just sayin')

That leads to to the biggest sabotager (is that a word?) that would be me. I am too laid back. It shows in my diet! Which also shows in my butt.......

Sunday, June 21, 2009

What would this world be like without Daddies?

I want to wish a Happy Father's Day to my 2 favorite Daddy's in the world! It may not be politically correct to mention my own Daddy first, you know since I knew him first! He has been the #1 parent in my life! I blogged about that some time ago...if you are interested in learning more about why I am the way that I am, read here. It touches on how great my dad is!

The next daddy that I must talk about is my wonderful husband Shane click on his name if you want to read the thankful post I wrote about him on Thanksgiving last year. I cannot share with all of you just how great he is! No really, I can't! (: Just trust me he is great! And some (notice I didn't say all) is more than I deserve!

And a shout out to all of you...love your dads, love your husbands. And even when its hard love the father of your children, just remember it is for your children and we all want whats best for the kids!

Friday, June 19, 2009

The way I are....

I am about to share something with you blogger peeps.

I am judgmental!

Why, you ask? Oh, you didn't? Let me tell you anyway....

Really, I have no idea why! I have been trying very hard for the last couple of years to not just make judgements about things I don't know about, or people whether I know them or not. Just thought I would let you know that about myself. I am also very sarcastic. People say that sarcasm is a shield or a defense mechanism, or a crutch. Could be! Could be that I am just a smarta**.

p.s. If you were sitting near the man on the flight from Dallas to Little Rock Friday afternoon that lost his vodka from the night before lunch sorry about that! That man may or may not be my husband.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Go me!

Welcome to another week of EMME! Amber hosts this weekly support group of women trying their best to improve their lifestyle. Be sure to click on the photo below to visit her site and all the other great ladies.



{ae filkins}



This was a good week for me. Remember I didn't weigh last week so the 2 pounds I have lost has been over a two week period. But as I have said before its better than a poke in the eye.



Last week while traveling I pretty much ate fast food. I did make good choices and do my best to cut down the soda consumption. When I have fast food I really like to drink iced tea, I am not a good iced tea maker, but I really do like to drink it.




I have been noticing that my arms and legs are smaller. We switched to AT&T uverse a couple of months ago. We have a channel called FIT TV. My oldest daughter has found this channel and appointed herself my personal trainer. Talk about motivating...she wants to spend that hour with me. Maybe its only so she can laugh at me trying to exercise but sadly she is at an age where I take what I can get.




Amber gives us a question each week to help us learn from each other. This week the question is:

Post a picture of the contents of your fridge so everyone can see how much healthy food is (not) in it.
In my attempt to keep it real I didn't try to neaten or rearrange anything even though I cringe everytime I open it these days.....summer is killing me!! My daughters have best friends that are sisters and they are always at our house or theirs. That gives me not 2 girls but 4 girls! I shouldnt complain, they do not mind fixing their own food! But then I end up with this, things just shoved in! BTW: look hard, not much healthy in there. *hangs my head in shame*

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Show us where you live....



It's another show us where you live Friday...that I didn't get to until Sunday. Click on the picture above to visit Kelly's blog and the bathrooms of MANY others.

Welcome to our bath:
this is the entrance from the master bedroom!
The prints are some canvases I bought at Gordmans a couple of years ago. The table is from Pier 1 was labeled as a desk, it has 2 small drawers.

Vanity area. We took the ceiling to top of vanity mirror! It was huge! I really like these that came from Garden Ridge at $99 for each. I wanted to hang them vertically but the sinks are not centered and they looked stupid. They could not hang lower because of electrical outlets. You can tell a man made those decisions. Not a good one. I would have sacrificed those outlets as I have outlets inside the false drawers below the sinks.

Back in 2004 I framed this picture of the girls taken in 2/1998. E was 3 SJ was 5 months old. This was the day before SJ spent 4 days in the hospital with RSV.

The evening I put this picture out SJ wrote this note to E!! I still laugh everytime I see it. I keep it behind the picture in the frame.

The black leather rectangle ottoman came from IO Metro. Most of their stuff is too modern for my taste but a great store.

Our small chandeleir, I love the ceiling medallion! We used a lighting designer from a small local hardware store that didn't charge anything if we bought from him. He spent a couple of hours here at our house helping me to pick fixtures, ceiling fans, and cabinet and door knobs that I ordered as I could.

Both doors are entrances to the L-shaped closets. Our other 2 bathrooms are nothing special and I was too lazy to take pictures and talk about something so uninspiring.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Lynn Needs:

I was over reading some old posts on Connie's blog and she posted some of the thing.s she needs per google.....me being the follower that I am thought this might be fun! Here is what Lynn needs according to google.

Lynn you need to figure out a special way to deal with your stress girl. Another way besides food. Go for a walk, a hot bath, ...
Lynn need some hugs from you!!
Lynn Needs Help With Her Baby Y'all!.
LYNN needs help
(no lie-those were the first 4 things google tells me I need)
Lynn needs a blog {there is one we can take off the list}
Lynn Needs Your Help Again -- Vote for her in Flex Magazine's Bikini Contest! She has posed for Playboy and was on VH1's Most Smartest Model. {I am guessing this is not the same Lynn that needs to find a way to handle stress that is not food}

I am cracking myself up!!!

On the upside....

no scale to weigh myself. :) On the downside....too many mirrors. For some reason I never look at myself in the mirror at home. Maybe I am acclimated to them?? I imagine I divert my eyes when I see them! So staying in a hotel ALL by myself I am running around with mirrors everywhere! This is the week at Cheer camp.....luckily no one expects me to do any cheering-that could get ugly quick!


The girls are staying in a fairly new dorm room at one of the State University campuses. Their room is on the 3rd floor with no elevators. And in true college fashion nothing is close by, everything is a bit of a walk. In case I forget to mention it-I LOVE cheer camp!!! I cannot tell you when I last had so much fun. (sad, I know)

On to business. Its time for another week of Extreme Makeover Me Edition. Amber hosts our weekly support group (click on picture below) please go and support all of my buddies in this attempt to improve our health and our lives.




{ae filkins}


This weeks question "What's your favorite thing to drink while you're losing weight? We all know how important it is to get that water intake up, especially with summer almost here. What's your favorite way to spice it up?" is easy for me. I am not really a spice it up kind of girl. I have been getting a large water with extra ice from Sonic every morning! Yes it costs $.47 and its so worth it. After I finish that water I have enough ice to refill a couple of more times!!! My water intake has risen in the weeks since school got out and I have been doing it this way!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Let me show you where I live.....the office

Kelly over at Kelly's Korner is hosting show us where you live Friday's. Click on the picture above to visit and see more of where others live.


Below is my computer armoire-it houses the desktop computer aka: the family computer. I use the laptop sitting in my chair. This is the last room in our house we decorated. The walls are a deep olive green. Since this room has been finished it is the most often used room in the house, if all 4 of us are in here we curl up in chairs together or someone is on the floor. The chair was my grandmothers vanity chair from the 1930's. I have her entire bedroom set she and my grandfather met when they married in 1919. Since I do not have a room for it, I keep it at my dad's house.The armoire closed. I bought this 2 houses ago to use for our computer, since then it ws used for a TV when we had a desk for the computer.
Our chairs. The one on the left is my husbands brown leather recliner. All the leather in our house is the same brown leather so we can move things from room to room as needed. I LOVE my chair. It is the first chair in my adult life I have referred to a chair as my chair. We are becoming little old people retiring to our chairs in the evening to watch our "programs". Make sure you see the FABULOUS viny branches hanging from the ceiling. I love them as well. They came from a decorator/antique store here in town, where they were hanging from the ceiling on their covered porch. The furniture for this room had been ordered and I was relaxing on that porch waiting for my friends to finish their shopping after a glass of wine (or 2) I looked up and thought they would be perfect!
The view from "my" chair. Just picture Y&R and you are here with me!!

Hope you enjoyed the visit. I was not going to post but since this is my favorite room in the house I wanted to share. Be sure and visit next Friday to see our master bath. It is my 2nd favorite in the house!!!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

And the winner of staying the same is........

....it's me of course!! Cause week after week of EMME-here I am! 10 weeks and I feel like I have not gotten very far! Enough about me!
{ae filkins}
This weeks question is:

What's your favorite beauty secret?

I have a few.....

  • drink plenty of water, I feel like it has lots to do with my clear skin
  • Oil of Olay moisturizer with spf 15
  • never blow drying my hair, it has stays pretty healthy by washing it at night then in the morning when it is dry I do whatever I need to
  • sleeping at least 7 hours (so hard for me to do)

Make sure to visit Ambers blog to read more about

Extreme Makeover Me Edition